Corny Jokes

Updated 2026-10-04 · Jokes and Puns editorial team

Quick answer: This page serves up corny jokes, the clean groaners built on food, farms and sound-alike words such as shucks, ears, melon and dill. You will find long jokes, short ones, lines for captions, question-and-answer jokes, jokes for kids and a few safe to share at work or school.

Best Corny Jokes

Why did the farmer bury his money in the field? He wanted rich soil.
Why shouldn't you tell secrets in a cornfield? There are too many ears.
Why did the potato cross the road? It saw a fork in the road.
What did the lettuce say to the celery? Stop stalking me.
How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste.
Why did the orange stop? It ran out of juice.
What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little wine.
What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry.
Why do melons get married in a church? They cantaloupe.
How do you make a lemon drop? Let it fall.
I thought about telling a cooking joke, but it was a little half baked.
Why did the farmer name his hog Ink? He kept running out of the pen.
What is a tree's favorite drink? Root beer.
Why did the cookie cry? Its mother was a wafer so long.

Short Corny Jokes

Corn is a-maize-ing.
Let's romaine calm.
Let's taco bout it.
I'm kind of a big dill.
Don't get so beet up about it.
Turnip the volume.
That joke was un-bean-lievable.
Berry nice to meet you.
Lemon be honest, this joke is sour.

Corny Jokes for Texts and Captions

Having an a-peel-ing day.
Squash the drama and eat the pie.
I'm rooting for you.
Thyme to relax.
Stay fresh, stay sweet, stay corny.
Grape expectations, with a little whine.
Peachy keen, thanks for asking.
Be a whisk taker, because the best cakes need one.
Bean there, done that.
Why was the pie so confident? It had a great crust in itself.

Corny Jokes With Answers

What kind of nut has no shell?

A cashew.

What kind of beans don't grow in a garden?

Jelly beans.

What is the best thing to put into a pie?

Your teeth.

What is green and goes to summer camp?

A brussel scout.

What do you call a peanut in a spacesuit?

An astronut.

Why are tomatoes so well read?

They're well red.

Corny Jokes for Kids

Why did the strawberry cry? Its parents were in a jam.
What is yellow and goes click? A ballpoint banana.
What do you call a bear in the rain? A drizzly bear.
What is a frog's favorite candy? A lollihop.
Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side.
What goes ha ha plop? Someone laughing their head off.
What did the policeman say to his belly button? You're under a vest.
Why did the rabbit get a promotion? He was a real go getter, always one hop ahead.

Corny Jokes to Share at Work or School

Never trust the stairs at the office. They're always up to something.
I asked the copier for a day off, and it said I'd just make a copy of yesterday.
Teacher: You missed school yesterday. Student: Not very much.
Why did the cafeteria clock run slow? It went back four seconds.
What did the pencil sharpener say to the pencil? Stop going in circles and get to the point.
Why did the lettuce get a promotion? It was a head above the rest.
Corn is the best student because it's all ears.
What do you call a farmer who tells a bad joke in a meeting? A cornball.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is a corny joke?

A corny joke is a clean, old fashioned joke with an obvious pun, often about food or farms. It is meant to get a groan and a smile at the same time.

Why are they called corny?

The word corny describes something so familiar and sentimental that it is a little silly, and it fits jokes built on farm and food puns, since corn is the classic farm crop.

Are corny jokes good for kids?

Yes. They are clean, easy to follow and full of simple wordplay, so children can learn to tell them quickly and enjoy the groan their family gives them.

How do I tell a corny joke well?

Commit fully. Say the setup, pause and deliver the pun with a straight face. The groan is the reward, so never apologize for the joke or explain it.